Top 10 things seen in the moat

(My personal, no-maintenance aquarium right off our balcony.)

1. Nurse shark
2. Upside-down jellyfish
3. Mangrove snapper
4. Moray eel
5. Spiny lobster (giant!)
   
6. Angel fish
7. Rainbow parrot fish
8. Turtle (Spot)
9. Puffer fish
10. Sergeant majors, sea cucumbers and a bunch of tropical fish I don't know the names
    

The last man

A friend of mine alerted me to a recent article in Fortune Magazine by Stanley Bing that really hit home.

Titled The last man, it talks about how elevator usage rates prompt an investigation into finding a remaining lone employee. This sole employee always has too much to do because things malfunction due to lack of maintenance. And, he has the audacity and initiative to make things better.

Here at the fort, that would be Robin, the lone maintenance guy trying to fix everything that has been in a woeful state of neglect. On any given day, The Last Man never stops moving and doing, maintaining complex, jerry-rigged systems that are pushed way beyond what they were designed to do.

For example, in a typical day, potable water (drinking, showers, laundry) use is around 900 gallons. Lately, there's been a 33% increase, with usage hovering around 1,200 gallons/day. Not a very good thing for the poor reverse osmosis system that can only make about 1,000 gallons of water a day, provided the sea water salinity level is low enough.

Then there's the cistern water, used mainly for flushing toilets. Typical usage is around 300 gallons a day, about 200 flushes. Lately, there's been a 150% increase, with usage around 500+ gallons a day, about 333 flushes. Not a very good sign for a rainwater-supplied system where there hasn't been measurable rain since February 2.

Of course, all that water and waste must go somewhere. The leech fields are taking on more than 1,000 gallons daily and the poopy tank gets almost 400 lbs of sludge a month. Redoubt and Mt. St. Helen's could pale in comparison when that eruption blows!

Meanwhile, a staff of 5-6 law enforcement rangers handled a whopping 65 law enforcements incidents over a 365-day period (less than one incident a week).

Now that the internet is back and general population usage is limited right now due to bandwidth testing, I can't wait to check more of Bing's writings, like Crazy bosses and Bulls**t jobs.

Near the breaking point

I returned from Iowa to an island filled with strife: the Internet connection was down.

While merely annoying and an inconvenience in most locations, this is a very serious issue here in the land without phones and other "normal" communication methods. Internet chatting, Internet phone calls and the like have become expected here, and are greatly depended on.

On this island of 25 or so residents, rumors spread faster than a wildfire across a drought-stricken plain with 30 mph winds. The rumors and conjecture surrounding this downed connection were pretty entertaining (and continue).

The truth was much more boring and quite a letdown compared to the crazy rumors circulating about this event. The cause was a simple, yet complex equipment failure. Simple because a part needed to be replaced. Complex because the part and the repair guy had to be here at the same time.

It only took about two weeks but now it's back!

Top 10 things I learned on my Iowa trip

1. My mom has the equivalent of a 10'x 18' hole in her house. This is based on an evaluation by a guy from the home heating assistance program who came with his laptop to evaulate the house with a fan and wind tunnel contraption, an infrared camera and other equipment. (The goal for houses is a 10' x 20' hole so that was good news.)


2. The Marine Corps has Semper Fi (Always Faithful), the Coast Guard has Semper Paratus (Always Ready) and according to my brother, Sergeant First Class Smith, the Army has Semper Gumby (Always Flexible).


3. My hometown still holds the annual Easter Egg hunt. It is still going strong with thousands of participants.


4. If you look in the manual hard enough, you can find out how to disable the seatbelt warning chime and light, child lock features and other safety features. (But you have to be coordinated, buckling and unbuckling the seatbelt at least 3 times in under 10 seconds).


5. There is a book coming out this fall about my hometown. (See previous entry.)


6. A primary ingredient in meth production, anhydrous ammonia, is a common chemical farmers plow into the ground at this time of year. (There is also a large meth production industry around my hometown.)


7. Conversational topics to avoid with my mom include a.m. vs. p.m., her alleged tandem skydiving experience and whatever is written in her daily planner.


8. The annoying town whistle still blows and will knock you out of bed at 7 a.m. (It also blows at noon, 1 p.m. and 6 p.m.)


9. My brother's garage, complete with free weights, treadmill, elliptical and cable TV, has become the local fitness club.


10. The Iowa DOT goes overboard on their enforcement of tire tread on any equipment driving down the road.

Hollowing out the middle

There's an interesting book about my hometown.

My brother (who's shipping out to Iraq soon) and his wife appear around minute 1:01 of the trailer.

Check it out!

Climate change

I was greeted in Iowa with snow, overcast skies and blizzard warnings. The brief taste of winter weather was nice for a change from the 80 degrees and steaming humidity, but I'm glad it is now back to a balmy 50 degrees and sunshine.

On the road again

We head back to Key West tomorrow for our scheduled 4 days off. On Friday, I head back to the land of semi-reliable internet and phone service: Iowa.

I'm going back to see my mom (who recently had her driver's license revoked by the neurologist who didn't think she should be driving with a brain tumor) and my brother Lee (who is once again being deployed to Iraq).

In the meantime, my loyal and not-so loyal readers can take a look at some photos I was finally able to upload: Robin's birthday (awesome!), fishing (depleting the stock) and the big boondoggle digs going on at the fort: an archeological expedition and a contractor flushing a rag down the toilet and stopping up the entire septic system for a day.

See the photos.

My next blog will be posted from the confines of my hometown's public library, still run by the mean librarian as when I was growing up (if she doesn't hold true to form and kick me out because I'm no longer a hometown patron).